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Click on any one of the links to go to the particular joke




Wannstedt v Campo
Dallas head coach Dave Campo, clearly upset about the Cowboys' losing record, decides to find out from Dave Wannstedt what his secret is. So, Campo travels up to a Dolphins practice and asks Wannstedt, "Coach, how is it that your team is so good? What's your secret?"
Dave Wannestedt responds by calling Dan Marino over. "Dan, who's your father's brother's nephew?" Marino answers, "Why coach, that's easy. It's me."
Dave Wannestedt turns to Campo and says, "That's the secret, Dave. A smart quarterback. You've got to have a smart quarterback."
Thinking he's finally got all the tools he needs, Campo returns to Texas and the Cowboys work-out. He promptly calls over Troy Aikman. "Aikman! Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Troy looks perplexed, thinks a minute and says, "Coach, can I get back to you after practice on that one?" Campo (disgusted) says, "OK."
During practice, Aikman calls over Deion Sanders. "Deion, coach just asked me the weirdest question. Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Sanders: "Duh! That's easy. It's me!"
After practice, Aikman catches up with Campo: "Coach, I think I've got it. My father's brother's nephew is Deion Sanders."
Campo(angry): "No, No, NO! You idiot!! It's Dan Marino!!! | Back to top


Jets coach, Dolphins coach and God
Jets coach dies and enters the Pearly Gates, God takes him on a tour. He shows the coach a little two-bedroom house with a faded Jets banner hanging from the front porch. "This is your house, coach. Most people don't get their own houses up here," God says.
The Jets coach looks at the house, then turns around and looks at the one sitting on top of the hill. It's a huge two-story mansion with white marble columns and little patios under all the windows. Miami Dolphins flags line both sides of the sidewalk and a huge Fightin' Dolphins banner hangs between the marble columns.
"Thanks for the house, God. But let me ask you a question. I get this little two-bedroom house with a faded banner and the Phins coach gets a mansion with new Dolphins banners and flags flying all over the place. Why is that?" God looks at him seriously for a moment. "That's not the Dolphins' coach's house," God says. "That's mine." | Back to top


The Buffalo Bills
A man won the lottery -- about $140 million. He had three sons. He told his sons that he had won the lottery, that he now had a lot of money and he would like to know what each one of them would like to have. Money was no object.
The first son said that he had always wanted a Jaguar. The father went out and--since money was no object--bought him 7 Jaguars in different colors so that he'd have a different Jag to drive every day.
The second son said that he had always wanted a motorcycle, so the father went out and--since money was no object--bought him 14 new motorcycles, 7 dirt bikes and 7 touring bikes, so he'd have different bikes to drive every day.
The third and youngest son, only 8 years old, said he had always wanted a Mickey Mouse outfit. So--money being no object--the father went out and bought his son the Buffalo Bills. | Back to top


The Chicago Bears.......
There was a Mamma bear, and Daddy bear, and a little girl that lived with them. One day the little girl went to the Daddy and said, "I don't want to live with Mamma, because she beats me." Then she said, "I don't wanna live with you either, because you beat me too. Daddy bear said,"Who do you want to live with then?". The girl then replied,"The Chicago Bears, because they don't beat anyone! | Back to top


A Dolphins fan
A Dolphins fan was enjoying himself at the game in a packed Pro Players Stadium, until he noticed an empty seat down in front. He went down and asked the guy next to it if he knew whose seat it was. The guy said, "Yes, that's my wife's seat. We have never missed a game since the Don Shula days, but now my wife is dead." The fan offered his sympathy and said it was really too bad he couldn't find some relative to give the ticket to and enjoy the game together. "Oh no," the guy said, "they're all at the funeral." | Back to top


Mike Ditka's Pre-game Pep talk
Mike Ditka, New Orleans Saints football coach with a reputation for optimism, came into the locker room to give his team a pre-game pep talk.
"All right Boys!" he cried cheerfully, "here we are, unbeaten, untied and unscored upon - and ready for the first game of the season." | Back to top


Q. What has six legs and throws touchdowns?
A. Three really good quarterbacks! | Back to top


Daffy-Nition: Football
Football is a game played by really athletic and physically fit people, and watched by 80 thousand spectators who really need the exercise. | Back to top


Q. Why aren't there any tornadoes in Indianapolis?
A. Because we've never heard of a touchdown at their stadium. | Back to top


Q. What do you call a Buffalo Bill with a SuperBowl ring?
A. A thief! | Back to top


John Elway and the doctor....
Elway: Doctor, I have terrible pain in my left leg. What could be the cause?
Doctor: It must be the old age you're facing John.
Elway: But as far as I know, both my legs are of the same age. | Back to top


Q. Boxscore: Why was six afraid of seven?
A. Because seven 'eight' nine! | Back to top


The Judge and Michael Irvin
Judge: Just what good have you done to humanity by your crimes?
Irvin: Well, atleast I kept 4 policemen busy tracking all my actions! | Back to top


Albert Einstein and the Dallas Cowboy
Albert Einstein arrives at a party and introduces himself to the first person he sees and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers "241." "That is wonderful!," says Albert. "We will talk about the Grand Unification Theory and the mysteries of the Universe. We will have much to discuss!"
Next Albert introduces himself to a woman and asks, "What is your IQ?" To which the lady answers, "144." "That is great!," responds Albert. "We can discuss politics and current affairs. We will have much to discuss!"
Albert goes to another person and asks, "What is your IQ?" to which the man answers, "51."
Albert responds, "then you must be a member of the Dallas Cowboys" | Back to top


The teacher and the student
Teacher (to student): Tom, name the 4 seasons of the year.
Student: Baseball, basketball, Hockey and Football | Back to top


The Sports-shop owner
The sports-shop owner was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS.
He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES.
The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read...MAIN ENTRANCE. | Back to top


Daffy-Nition - Bryan Cox:
He always manages to open the wrong thing at the wrong time - His mouth! | Back to top


Recipe for Thanksgiving
Source: The Miami Herald
The All-Thanksgiving top 5 name team:
1. Atlanta OG Evan Pilgrim
2. Tennessee WR Isaac Byrd
3. Arizona DE Simeon Rice
4. Green Bay DE Vonnie Holliday
5. Washington P Matt Turk(ey)
 | Back to top


A couple of Bengals fans...:
Joke submitted by Todd Gislason (from jokeaday.com)

A guy walks into a bar with a dachshund under his arm. The dog is wearing a Cincinnati Bengals jersey and helmet, and is festooned with Bengal pom-poms.

The bartender says, "Hey! No pets are allowed! You'll have to leave."

The guy begs him, "Look, I'm desperate! We're both big fans, the TV's broken at home, and this is the only place around where we can see the game."

After securing a promise that the dog will behave, and warning him that he and the dog will be thrown out if there's any trouble, the bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar and watch the game.

The big game begins with the Bengals receiving the kickoff. They march down field, get stopped at the 30, and kick a field goal. Suddenly, the dog jumps up on the bar and begins walking up and down the bar giving high-fives to everyone.

The bartender says, "Wow, that is the most amazing thing I've seen! What does the dog do if they score a touchdown?"

The owner replies, "I don't know, I've only had him for three years." | Back to top



Add a Joke - If you have any more football jokes, please email them to me, and I'll add it right here on this page, an ofcourse, give you the credit.

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